Saturday, May 25, 2013

You Couldn't Make This Stuff Up - Naked Man Bites Police

Real News Can Be Stranger Than Fiction 



I'm the kind of person that finds weird news stories fascinating. When I come across one that strikes me as particularly bizarre I clip it out and keep it. I'm not sure why. It's not like I can use any of this stuff in a story. No one would believe it.

Back in March of this year I came across a story from Eastern Canada. I've included the link for a version of the story, though it's not the version I read back then. The salient points are here though.

A man in his twenties wandered down the street, wearing nothing but a pair of socks. He knocked on the door of a house belonging to a senior and when the door was answered, entered the house and sat on the couch. He confessed he'd taken some "drugs" and asked to go to the hospital. When the police arrived he went willingly with them to the hospital, wearing his socks and a bathrobe the homeowner provided.

At the hospital the man began jumping up and down on a gurney and when police tried to stop him he bit two of them on the forearm. Apparently the homeowner was not injured in anyway and the police officers' wounds were minor.

After reading this story I had a couple of questions. How on earth did a naked twenty-something man manage to wander around without attracting any attention? Believe me I'm always checking and I'd notice if a naked guy was wandering around in my neighborhood.

Did the homeowner get his bathrobe back? What did he talk about with his visitor while waiting for the police? Maybe the conversation went something like this:

Homeowner:  "Someone will be here to pick you up shortly. Why don't you have a seat while you wait?"

Naked Visitor:  "Thanks."

Homeowner:  "On second thought— No. Don't sit down just yet. Aren't you cold? Why don't you slip into this lovely fuzzy bathrobe?"

I'm treating this lightly, but I do remember in the original news story the homeowner said he was not frightened and that the young man was polite and well mannered. At least until he got to the hospital.

Honestly, you couldn't make this stuff up. Well, maybe you could, but as a writer I wouldn't recommend it.


http://www.cbc.ca/m/touch/news/story/2013/03/06/toronto-milton-nude-man-bites-police-officers.html

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

An Interview With Taz and Reed from Be My Alien


A couple of author friends popped into today to talk about their latest release. Things didn't go quite as planned. Sometimes writing's like that.  



Thanks so much for having us here today! Oh wait, who are we, I can hear some of you ask? Let me back up a mo and start again.

I’m Julie Lynn Hayes, she’s M.A. Church, heretofore to be known as Michelle. Just call me Julie. We’re here today to talk about our first joint project, Be My Alien, which was released by Dreamspinner May 8th.  And which is now #34 at ARe, on their bestseller list!




Let’s start at the beginning. I totally blame Michelle for hooking me on aliens.

Michelle: *snort* I corrupted her, or so she says.

Julie:  *laughs* That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it. It wasn’t until I read your most excellent book, Nighttime Wishes, that I first encountered your fixation on beings from other worlds, and… wait, hold on a second. What are you two doing here?

Reed: Don’t blame me, I was just following Taz. He said we needed to come here, and I guess he’s right. Look, you’re talking about us. That’s a bit cheeky, don’t you think?

Julie: What? Cheeky? Hey, Reed, I was going to say nice things, how does that make us cheeky? 
Michelle, a little help here?

Michelle: Oh no, don’t drag me into this. Besides, I think you’re doing just fine on your own, Julie.

Julie: Gee, thanks. *sneaks a peek at these two lovely men* Wow, what gorgeous guys we’ve created, I have to admit.

Taz: Reed, I appreciate these two humans and their efforts to talk about us, but I feel that we can handle this ourselves, don’t you?

Reed: Indeed I do. So why don’t you two ladies find something else to do? Maybe go to a strip club or something?

Julie: *look at Michelle, and she shrugs *

Michelle: Well, if they screw this up, it’s on them. I say we go look at pretty men. You’re driving, though.

Julie: *walks out door mumbling under her breath* Don’t I always?

Michelle: *pokes Julie in the back* But you like driving. Am I going to have to listen to this all the way to Atlanta???

Purses are grabbed and a door slams shuts.

Reed:  *whispers* Good Lord, are they gone?

Taz: *looks around the corner* Yes, thank the stars. I swear, those two… So… *Taz rubs his hands together, a gleam in his eye* Looks like we got free rein now. You ready to start?”

Reed: Yes, more than ready. They’ve gone about things the wrong way. Did you even hear mention of the title?

Taz: No, not a word.

Reed: *shakes his head* Women!

Taz: *cocks his head and regards Reed* My mother is a woman, Reed.

Reed: *snorts* I know, I met her, remember? So’s mine, by the way, and thanks for asking…

Taz: But I didn’t ask?

Reed: *sighs* It’s just an expression. *mumbles under his breath* Damn, need to get that book. Bad. Hey, babe, where do you think we should start?

Taz: How about like this? *he climbs onto Reed’s lap and lays his head on Reed’s shoulder, purring*

Reed: Oh damn, seriously? *takes a deep breath* I thought we’re here to talk? You know, about us?

Taz: *purrs louder* Go ahead and talk. I can hear you. *begins to rock in Reed’s lap*

Reed: Oh jeez Louise, that’s distracting… *clears throat* Um, okay… we met… we met… oh yeah, it was almost Valentine’s Day. I was working late ‘cause I didn’t have anything better to do. You know how it is when you’re single and it’s been a while… that day means less than nothing.

Taz: It didn’t mean anything to me either.

Reed: Well, to be fair, you never heard of it ‘til you got here.

Taz: Oh yeah, I guess that’s true.  *squirms a bit on Reed’s lap* I’m just lucky I was in the right place at the right time.

Reed: I think I’m the lucky one, babe. That’s what they call karma.

Taz: Karma? What has this to do with driving?

Reed: *groans* Later, I’ll explain later. So anyway, I had to meet a customer at the Empire State Building after work, and that’s where I met Taz. He knocked me off my feet, literally.

Taz: What can I say, you caught my attention? My night hadn’t been going very well. I had just been dumped, then I saw you. I really didn’t mean to knock you down, you know.

Reed: Oh, I wasn’t complaining. I ended up on the floor with an arm full of sexy male. *blush* Well, at the time I thought I had an arm full of sexy male. Little did I know just what I was holding.

Taz: *giggle* You should’ve seen the look on your face the first time my stripes showed up! I mean, you freaked out, but still, for a second there… I don’t have the words!

Reed: *shakes head* It was probably the same kind of shocked look I had when that tail of yours put in an appearance.

Taz: *rubs cheek against Reed’s jaw* That reminds me, when are you going to let me—

Reed: Whoa now. Let’s not go there, babe. You give that away, Julie and Michelle will both want to skin you. It’ll be a race to see which one of them gets you.

Taz: Silly women. Neither one of them gets me. I’m all yours… *licks his way up Reed’s neck*

Reed: All mine, you’re right. Um, um…. Oh yeah, the title. Be My Alien. Pretty cute, don’t you think?
Taz: Mmhmmm, you’re very cute.

Reed: Not me, the title *blushes*

Taz: Oh, that’s not bad. Those two earth women seem to be able to put words together rather nicely, don’t they?

Reed: Better than me at times. Oh babe, you gotta quit that, or I might…

Taz: I’m wearing those special—

Reed: Oh lord, from the shop? *groans* Oh yes, my shop. I have my own business, I should mention that. A Touch of Class. Here in New York. I mean there… I mean… Taz, please be careful, you’re right over my—

Taz: I know, Reed…  I know… *silences him with a kiss*

Taz: Oh yes. We told them how we met. Did we tell them about ourselves though?

Reed: What do you mean?

Taz: Well, I’m from the planet Trygos, the most important planet in the Trygos galaxy, and only one of two planets capable of sustaining life. The other planet is Haatmiess. When Trygosheans put someone down, they say they’re like a Haatmiess, which is considered a major insult. My full name is Fabrintazo, Taz for short. I’m about 5'11" in your earth measurements, and I have a wiry, muscular build. My hair is a mixture of red and orange and brown and it’s long and luxurious, and reaches below my shoulders.

Reed: That’s very true. He often twists it into a braid and lets it flow loose over his back. He’s very acrobatic and he loves heights. Which scared the hell out of me at one point in the book. Taz has cat green eyes and purrs when he's pleased. *smiles* I make him purr often.

Taz: Yes, you do. Reed’s full name is Reed Hatcher and he’s about my height and build. He has very light brown hair that tends to bleach out in the warmer months and he has the most beautiful hazel eyes. Oh! And he has this cute little dimple in his cheek too. The one on his face, not the other one. Though that’s cute, too.

Reed: *blushes* Babe, too much information.

Taz: *grins* And he’s a business owner, too. A very important man in his world.  *nods head* And in his business, he has a back room that sells very special things. I like the back room.

Reed: I actually have a degree in elementary education, but I never taught. My parents moved to Florida and I ended up here in New York.

Taz: Thank the stars you did! *frowns* Should we tell them about Vorlod?

Reed: What’s to tell? The bastard’s no longer here on Earth and can’t bother you anymore.
Taz: Well, he was the reason I was here on Earth to begin with.

Reed: We should save that story, though, don’t you think? Can’t spill all the beans, now can we?
Taz: *glances around the floor* I don’t think we spilled anything.

Reed: *rolls his eyes* You’re right, we didn’t. What was I thinking?

Taz: *eyes him suspiciously* Are you having fun with me?

Reed: Not yet, babe, but I intend to, I promise you.

Taz: *grins even broader, stripes appearing on his neck* Then let’s go now and, how did you put it, avoid the rush hour?

Reed: *tries not to laugh* Close enough. *fastens their lips together, he rises, Taz clinging to him, and they make their way from the room. *
* * * *
Hope y’all enjoyed meeting the characters from Be My Alien!                              

Be My Alien Blurb:  Reed Hatcher’s life is work, work, work. He owns a successful men’s boutique in New York City, but a love life is out of the question—for many reasons. It’s almost Valentine’s Day, and business is brisk. On an unexpected visit to the Empire State Building, a sexy man literally falls into Reed’s lap. His name is Taz and he’s just been dumped by his date. One look and Reed is hooked. He offers to buy Taz some coffee and they leave together.
Reed is attracted to Taz and takes him home to his apartment. But Reed discovers there’s more to Taz than he realized—especially when Taz’s stripes begin to show. And he has a tail? Turns out Taz is not quite like Reed. In fact, he comes from another planet, far far away, and he’s only on Earth for a vacation.

Reed never believed in aliens before, but he’s facing one now, and dear God, what is he going to do? Just when he decides he loves Taz and together they can handle anything, the alien that dumped Taz decides he wants him back and steals him away.

Can Reed live with the memory of what he almost had, and the love he found and lost? How can he ever face the moonlit skies again?

Excerpt:  “Are you okay? Hello?”
Reed dragged his mind away from those sexy green eyes. “Ah, huh? What?”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall on top of you like that. You see, it was like this. I was pushed, and you just happened to be there and….” The stranger grinned at Reed. “And down we went.”
Reed shifted under the body lying so contentedly on top of him. Hell’s bells, the guy fit against him perfectly. From the feel of things, they were both close to the same height. Which also meant certain things were… aligned. “Oh yeah, I’m okay. Banged my head a little, but I’m fine.”
The stranger bit his bottom lip, his teeth worrying the tender skin. Reed debated slamming his head against the floor a few more times in the hopes of rattling his brain back to normal as the stranger rolled off him.
“I really am sorry.”
“No harm done.” Reed sat up and looked at the guy once again. Well, not much harm, anyway. His libido just had to pick now to perk up, didn’t it? But damn, this guy was sexy. Reed struggled to his feet and held his hand out to the man still on the floor, looking up at him. The guy took his hand and let Reed pull him up. “Name’s Reed. Are you okay?”
“Hi, Reed!” The guy hopped to his feet, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. “My name is Taz. Nice to meet you, and yes, I am.”
For a moment there was a flash in the guy’s eyes that belied his statement. “Good, that’s good. Glad to hear it. Well, I guess I’d better be going—”
A forlorn expression crossed Taz’s face and his pretty eyes clouded. “Oh.” 
Reed hesitated. There was something about the guy that pulled at him. When was the last time he’d felt that pull? Way too long ago. Taz was cute, sure. But there was this look of hurt. Dammit, Taz just looked so lost. Insane as it was, he wanted to make it all better.

M.A. Church lives in the southern United States and spent many years in the elementary education sector. She is married to her high school sweetheart and they have two children. Her hobbies are gardening, walking, attending flea markets, watching professional football, racing, and spending time with her family on the lake.
But her most beloved hobby is reading. From an early age, she can remember hunting for books at the library. Later nonhuman and science fiction genres captured her attention and drew her into the worlds the authors had created. But always at the back of her mind was the thought that one day, when the kids were older and she had more time, she would write a book.
By sheer chance she stumbled across a gay male romance story on the web and was hooked. A new world opened up and she fell in love. Thus the journey started. When not writing or researching, she enjoys reading the latest erotic and mainstream romance novels.

My links:
Twitter @nomoretears00
Facebook: M.A. Church https://www.facebook.com/ma.church

Publishers:
Romance First Publishing: www.rfppublishing.com

Author bio:
Julie Lynn Hayes was reading at the age of two and writing by the age of nine and always wanted to be a writer when she grew up. Two marriages, five children, and more than forty years later, that is still her dream. She blames her younger daughters for introducing her to yaoi and the world of M/M love, a world which has captured her imagination and her heart and fueled her writing in ways she'd never dreamed of before. She especially loves stories of two men finding true love and happiness in one another's arms and is a great believer in the happily ever after. She lives in St. Louis with her daughter Sarah and two cats, loves books and movies, and hopes to be a world traveler some day. She enjoys crafts, such as crocheting and cross stitch, knitting and needlepoint and loves to cook. While working a temporary day job, she continues to write her books and stories and reviews, which she posts in various places on the internet. Her family thinks she is a bit off, but she doesn't mind. Marching to the beat of one's own drummer is a good thing, after all.  Her other published works can be found at Dreamspinner Press, MuseitUp Publishing and No Boundaries Press, and coming soon with both Extasy Books and Torquere Press. She has also begun to self-publish and is an editor at MuseitUp.  

My links:
Twitter @Shelley_runyon

Publishers:
eXtasy Books http://www.extasybooks.com/  (coming soon)
Torquere Press http://torquerepress.com/  (coming soon)